FamilyDrive - Your Nearest and Dearest
Everyone defines their family differently; some people have very close, big extended families, where everyone works together, and others have close tight knit families. Some people are virtually alone.
Here we’re defining ‘family’ as the group of people we care most about. Typically it’s parents and children, but as we said it varies.
In a way children are the most important, as they have no choice but to be dependent on someone, normally their parents. We want to look after them, make sure they’re healthy and happy, and provide for their future.
FamilyDrive looks at different events that can happen to a family, and how you can be helped and supported during and after these events, and how in some cases you can plan for some of them..
In this fast paced life it’s not easy for anyone to manage, grow and maintain a healthy family, and FamilyDrive provides a helping hand. Financial family wellness is really important because it affects the whole family not just the individual. Once we are on the journey it is so important to stop for a moment and think about protecting each stage of growth or development in your family situation. Also to think about the consequences if you were not there to guide the way forward.
married couples in the UK in 2015 (Office of National Statistics)
single parents with dependent children in the UK in 2017 (Statisto)
is owed by individuals in the UK (Feb 18, Finder.com)
people already in serious financial difficulty (FCA study)
Family is at the heart of what we are concerned with. Whether it is:
- looking at getting together
- an addition to the family
- protecting loved dependents throughout working life
- enjoying holidays and budgeting properly for them
- the position when handling a difficult situation such as a divorce or separation
- being pro-active in looking at making sure your wishes are followed on death – by making a will
There is a wealth of information to help. There are lots of calculators and guides to help with everything from a baby timeline through to a Christmas Money Planner. Once you know what you want to achieve, we then have the solutions to help you whether it be monthly savings, reducing your expenditure, consolidating expensive old debts or putting your hard earned money to best use.
Different types of families
On sociologytwynham.com which is an A Level revision site C H Thompson listed below the variety of structures families are found in:types of families
- Beanpole – in countries like Britain and the US, the number of children per generation has steadily gone down, while life span has increased. This has led to a shape of family tree that some researchers have likened to a beanpole — tall and thin, with few people in each generation.
- Classic extended family – an extended family sharing the same household
- Cohabitation – a couple living together who aren’t married
- Extended family – a family containing relatives in addition to the nuclear family
- Gay or lesbian family – same sex couple living together with children
- Kin – relatives based on marriage or genes
- Lone parent family – lone parent (either gender) with dependent children
- Modified extended family – an extended family living apart but still in communication via phone, email, Skype etc.
- Monogamy – a married couple of the opposite sex, who have sexual relations with each otherfamily data
- Nuclear family – a family consisting of an adult male and female with one or more children (including adopted)
- Polygamy – a marriage involving two or more wives or husbands
- Reconstituted family (blended family) – a family formed out of another relationship, otherwise known as a step-family
- Symmetrical family – authority and household tasks shared between male and female partners
Family Statistics UK 2017
In terms of dependents
Maternity and Babies
Starting a family or adopting is a major decision and should not be taken lightly – it’s a lifetime’s commitment. All too often people become pregnant through emotion and do not have the right support or finances to support a newborn child. On top of this it’s not easy raising children, particularly in the modern day. Getting support from grandparents is ideal but sometimes they are not available for a variety of reasons. YouDrive is all about getting support or self-education. There is so much information out there if you choose to look for it – see the NHS help section on Maternity
Knowing what you’re entitled to is also important and the HMRC site can help you calculate your entitlement
Planning and making sure you have enough money to give your child a good start is critical. If you’re short of money this leads to increased stress and anxiety which means you behave in a different way towards your child so planning is critical.
One excellent site full of help and support on bringing up children is the Government Money Advice Service. There are calculators and guides, all in simple English
Managing your finances is one thing but also understand what other benefits are available is equally important. This excellent government organisation; Working Families provides a significant amount of guidance and information about all areas of work, benefits, rights and things such as flexible working
Children and Adolescents
Kids do grow very quickly and things change. Try to plan ahead and forecast what’s going to happen by looking and talking to others. See .dots for understanding childrens’ behaviour. Once children are at school age, what then, and what’s your part in this?
Parentkind can help prepare your child for school. There are a list of support organisations likeTurn2Us and the US Parents providing insights in bringing up young people. Discipline is key for children, and difficult to get right. Smart Parent Advice have a good article on how to discipline your child.
When children get past ten they are already turning into mini adults (sometimes!!). You will see a massive change from 10 to 15 and again you need even more support and education in dealing with young adults. We want to treat them as we were treated and learning from your parents is a good thing, but each generation is slightly different and there are different circumstances that require a different approach. Today it seems to be harder than ever to grow up, with social media pressures and a threat of violence. See the Wise Up report under More Info.
Moving schools can be difficult – see what Family Lives say. The Nuffield Foundation support wellbeing through education, research and innovation and they provide access to the report on School Transition and Adjustment Research Study (STARS) – see More Info below.
Parents often look at their child in a loving emotional way rather than clinically – your child is made up of DNA from a number of sources with traits and characters. Look for your child’s characteristics – some might be musical or sports or mechanical – and try to foster them.
Managing a Family Alone
As we said earlier raising a family is not easy when there are two people engaged in the process, but what happens when you are a single parent bringing up a child (Superman or Superwoman?). Working and raising a child alone is hard work in all ways: financially, physically and mentally. Gingerbread are a charity supporting single parents, as are Single Parents There are benefits for single parents – see the guide from Lionheart – and support organisations such as Care for the Family
As parents, guardians, grandparents we are the leaders of our team in a way. As our team gets bigger and we build multiple layers within the team with grandchildren or adoption or marriages etc. we need to learn to lead and manage in a different way. YoungMinds give help on how friends and family can help you stay mentally healthy.
When we were just two people it was easier but as we get older and the team gets bigger and older we have to learn to respect other people’s views as well.
If you imagine running your family like a work team you would approach it in a different way. In fact we can often take learned examples from family life and put them into work team life and vice versa. At work you check on your team and make sure they are engaged and you’re aware of their needs and desires. You also review your team’s direction and make sure everything is operating correctly. Why not try this with your family team. The Drives in YouDrive are ideal to check your family health, financially, physically and mentally.
Another area of family life is dealing with each other. Life today is very hectic – two people come together and love each other and hope this will carry them through. Often it does not and people separate after some traumatic times. A number of organisations provide help with relationships – see Relate here and Supportline.
There are thousands of books and articles and institutions out there who can offer advice and guidance. Family Lives offer advice in a number of situations.
Couples do split up and go separate ways and whilst this is a sad and highly charged situation, individuals have to put their own personal feelings to one side and consider others too. Children and pets can enjoy life split between parents and have a rich and fulfilling upbringing. Two birthdays, two Christmas days two sets of holidays. Making sure people are not bruised and damaged physically or mentally is the key to building a life as split partners.
When we lose a member of our family, it causes enormous pain and makes us feel lost and alone. YouDrive hope that with support those remaining can build hope for the future and rebuild their lives, always remembering those who have passed but moving forward.
Whether the person leaving the family is an unborn child or an elderly relative, it always has a significant impact on those left behind.
Cruse Bereavement Care is a charity established in 1959 providing telephone email and website support to bereaved people.
How to deal with conflict in marriage
How to build relationships
This video from Care For The Family is part of a four part series of Marriage Sessions which deals with building relationships.
The box below shows some information on how ‘essentials’ can be affected by unexpected events . Hover over it and it will switch to show you information on how you can protect your family, and what’s involved. Click the button on the back to see more information and YouDrive’s view!
If you want to consider what impact a baby will have in terms of a timeline – using our tool from Money Advice Service
Look at how to secure your financial future as set out by MAS
See how much a baby costs with this calculator from the Money Advice Service (MAS)
Look at how to work out the costs of Christmas with this MAS calculator
Look at the options for separation / divorce as set out by MAS
Download the School Transition and Adjustment Research Study (STARS) report from UCL and Cardiff University on making the move to secondary school
Download the WiseUp report from the National Childrens Bureau Young Minds on prioritising wellbeing in schools